Personal Streangth and Wekkness:
Many are painfully aware of weaknesses that hold them back. Yet, surprisingly, they are unaware of their many strengths. Focusing on our weaknesses while ignoring our strengths can be a source of discouragement and failure. And glorifying our strengths while ignoring our weaknesses can be equally unproductive. It is only when we give equal weight to our strong points and faults that we can realize our potential. Also note that we must choose our friends carefully because each relationship nurtures our strengths and weaknesses. That is, we will grow better or worse, depending on whom we spend our time with.Considering how they affect our lives and that we seldom see the big picture, I will try to share some helpful ideas about our strengths and weaknesses.
PART ONE: OUR WEAKNESSES
We all want to be powerful. By powerful, I don't mean ruling over others, but
ruling over ourselves. How can we reach our dreams unless we first master
ourselves? This is why understanding and managing our weaknesses is so
important. The first lesson, then, is to remember that weakness means the
absence of power. The question we have to ask is not "Do I want to
overcome this weakness?" but "Do I want to be powerful or
powerless?"
Weakness is nothing to be ashamed of; it is part of human nature. We are not
dealing with a moral issue, but a practical one. That is, we want to know what
works. What will help us reach our goals? It is not weakness but strength that
will take us where we want to go. So, we need to identify our weaknesses and
overcome or manage them.
Yet, we also have to realize that we will never overcome ALL our weaknesses,
nor should we want to. For weaknesses are important. They help each of us to
become a unique individual. You see, it is not only the strengths of others
that make them appealing, but their weaknesses as well. We relate to their
flaws and root for them because we, too, are imperfect. And as we open up and
expose our weaknesses to friends, we develop intimacy, strengthening our
relationship. In fact, weaknesses contribute to our greatest relationship, our
love life, as well. For as Francois Mauriac
(1885~1970) wrote, "Human love is often but the encounter of two
weaknesses."
Although we are painfully aware of some of our weakness, we fail to acknowledge
others. Yet, the first step in overcoming any weakness is to become aware of
it. So, how do we detect character flaws that are hiding in the background? A
good way to start is by monitoring our negative emotions. Are we angry,
vengeful, resentful, jealous, envious...? They all point to weaknesses that we
can work on.
WHAT SHOULD WE DO AFTER
FINDING OUR FAULTS?
1. Change those you can. The important thing is not overcoming them, but the
strength we gain in doing so.
2. Accept those you cannot change.
3. Regularly come back to the ones you can't change, for what you can't do
today, you may be able to do tomorrow.
4. Embrace those you cannot change because it is what makes you unique. If
everyone were perfect, everyone would be the same, and we would live in a dull
world.
5. Use your weaknesses to develop compassion. Since others have to tolerate
your faults, it is only fair that you tolerate theirs. Also use your flaws to
learn new coping skills and strategies. In other words, use your weaknesses to
find new strength.
B) EXAMPLE WEAKNESSES
1st Weakness ;My first weakness
is I don't have enough confident in my task. When I doing something important
or make some decision I always needs people guide me, so that why this weakness
can obstruct my life forever.
1. If you envy (or admire) someone, that is useful information. It points to the person you would like to become. So make that your goal. You can even ask the person you admire how you can become more like them. They may not only be happy to help, but may develop into an important friend.
2. Anger and resentment. Here is useful advice from August
3. Ingratitude. Failure to be grateful for what we have prevents us from being happy, weakens relationships, and blocks more good from entering our lives. Live with a grateful heart and you will live a long, happy life.
4. Arrogant. People who think they know it all weaken themselves because they stop learning. They are also easily hurt by the criticism of others. The paradox is they become weak because of their fear of appearing weak.
5. Gullibility. To accept as true whatever one reads or hears without questioning the facts may leave one misinformed, ignorant, or open to manipulation by others.
6. Insecurity. To be uncomfortable with insecurity is to be uncomfortable with life, for insecurity is the nature of life. If you need to satisfy your hunger for security, rest with the assurance that although you cannot count on others or the world, you can always count on yourself. So, use your feelings of insecurity as a catalyst to develop self-reliance.
7. Failure. Failure is not possible unless one stops trying. Its cures are perseverance, patience, commitment, flexibility, creativity, and solution-oriented thinking. As Kin Hubbard (1868~1930) wrote, "There is no failure except in no longer trying. There is no defeat except from within, no really insurmountable barrier save our own inherent weakness of purpose."
8. Boredom. Boredom is a lack of interest in doing anything. It's equivalent to feeling life isn't interesting. Whenever you are troubled with boredom, rather than asking yourself why you don't feel like doing anything, ask what you SHOULD be doing. Why? Because what you SHOULD be doing is what you really WANT to do. The reason why you're not doing it is not because it isn't interesting, but because your subconscious has created a wall of resistance that is blocking you. To learn more about this problem and how to easily overcome it, see the "GAINING CONTROL OVER OUR LIVES" section of this article:
Part 1: List of
Strengths
Assess
your skills, and you will identify your strengths. This is an exercise worth
doing before any interview. It would also be wise to identify your strengths
and assess your skills. Come up with a list then divide them into the following
areas:
Transferable
skills
The skills that one gets in a
work environment (e.g. people skills, planning skills, communication skills and
much more)
Personal
traits
Those that make you unique (e.g.
hardworking, friendly, reliable and dependable, ability to work with little to
no supervision, expressive and punctual)
Knowledge-based skills or credentials
Skills acquired from education and experience (e.g., computer knowledge, languages, degrees, training and technical ability).
1. Faith, trust, and confidence. Unshakeable faith in ourselves and the world create a launching pad for success, for as William James (1842~1910) taught, "Pessimism leads to weakness, optimism to power"
2. Excited by life. Or, as Vincent van Gogh (1853~1890) said, "Love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well."
3. Living Courageously. After all, this is the bedrock of a happy life. Rabindranath Tagore (1861~1941) prays, "Let me not pray to be sheltered from dangers but to be fearless in facing them. Let me not beg for the stilling of my pain, but for the heart to conquer it. Let me not look for allies in life's battlefield but to my own strength. Let me not cave in." Arnold Schwarzenegger continues, "Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strength. When you go through hardship and decide not to surrender, that is strength."
4. Getting along with others. The Dalai Lama fills in the details, "In my own limited experience I have found that the more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. It helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the principal source of success in life. Since we are not solely material creatures, it is a mistake to place all our hopes for happiness on external development alone. The key is to develop inner peace."
5. Self-discipline (self-leadership). Self-discipline is an essential ingredient of success, and, therefore, a major strength. Judith Viorst aptly explains the true meaning of strength, "Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands -- and then eat just one of the pieces."
6. Follow-through. The greatest idea and the finest intention are utterly worthless unless we follow through. If you need some help in this area, I recommend, "FOLLOWING THROUGH, A Revolutionary New Model for Finishing Whatever You Start," by Steve Levinson, Ph.D. and Pete Greider, M.Ed., Unlimited Publishing, 2007.
7. Compassion. Compassion is love in action. The more of it we give away, the more of it comes back to us. Here's something to keep in mind; if we are not compassionate toward others, how can we be compassionate toward ourselves?
8. RESPONSIBILITY. We all have challenges, but when Tom prayed for a helping hand to solve his problems, God said, "I already gave you a helping hand. It is attached to your arm." When we accept responsibility, we realize that God helps those who help themselves. Sure, there are always excuses available if you are weak enough to use them, but wouldn't you rather be strong?
A wise man admits his weaknesses. So, I would admit mine if I had any. Ha! Ha! That is supposed to be funny. Now that that is over, let's get serious again. I'm going to end with three relevant quotations, followed by two more books for recommended reading.
"A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities." --William Arthur Ward (1921~1994)
"When I dare to be powerful - to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid" --Audre Lorde (1934~1992
